DIRECTOR: Ben Stewart
DESCRIPTION
Darkness retreat experience: A week in total darkness and isolation
I’ve had many difficult experiences, from relentless Ayahuasca sits, inescapable sweat lodges, biting mountain cold, and face-mangling car accidents. But never have I been broken like the darkness broke me. To spend a week in the black is indescribable. From the quiet, desperate solitude. The absolute fragility of your blindness. To the relentless endogenous DMT visions that fill the void with messages and horrors.
I have lived my life committed to sharing the truth, but this film is another level of vulnerability. I’ve never cried like this, prayed like this, or even laughed like this in front of anyone. Ultimately the darkness is the searchlight for all of our shadow. In my time spent in the black I understood how scared I was to love and be loved. How much of the world I had taken for granted. I understand now why this is one of the oldest ceremonies on earth.
In this director's cut, I also share for the first time the challenging relationship with my father, and the intensity of the moments surrounding his mental health collapse. All of which was woven into the fabric of this experience.
This Chakaruna Media documentary features Aubrey Marcus, Vylana Marcus, Ashkay Nanavati, Jamie Wheal, Kathy Shubin, Erick Godsey, Don Howard, Jon Dean, Bharati Gianert. Directed By Ben Stewart.