In today’s podcast I am joined by my brother, master musician and medicine man, Poranguí. Typical of most of my conversations with Poranguí, this podcast was its own kind of medicine journey for me. We cover a lot of ground, including the sun dance ceremony, my recent bodywork apprenticeship, and Poranguí plays some stunning songs that bring me to tears.

PORANGUI: I love you.

AUBREY: I love you too, brother. Unsurprisingly, that music was a reminder for me of what I do feel is home and something I've felt more in this past year than I've ever felt in my life. But I'm still carrying so much baggage from my journey back home, a place that I've been able to visit and I've always been able to visit it, I feel like, but more so recently than ever before, fully there. But man, the weight of the journey is, it feels heavier now than ever now that I've tasted home, now that I've really felt what it feels like to be with love and with source and free and unburdened the wild true self that I am. Fully. So that song hit man.

PORANGUI: Yeah, brother. Yeah. That's what I felt. I need to call us home. We're forgetting all the travels and all the work and all the running around and all the lokura. We're home. It's just like right. And that beautiful place right here when we get to come together. Get to be received. Welcomed. 

AUBREY: One thing that Charles Eisenstein talks about, he talks about the myth of struggle.

And I think this is also one of the pieces of luggage that I picked up. And this idea like, I gotta do all this work to get home. Maybe? Like maybe what is the work? And we'll talk about this. I mean, I'm sure there's stuff that's stored in my body and that the body is slower than the mind. And there's neural pathways that have been carved and different epigenetic switches that have been turned on based on certain stress hormones and emotions and things that, Dr. Joe Dispenza talks about in your other placebo. There's things that are in my physical being that might be a little bit slow and have patience and grace, but it doesn't necessarily have to be hard. Like everybody says, do the work. And it is work. But I think we all believe it has to be hard for it to work. And maybe that's one of the pieces of luggage that I just gotta let go of, man. 

PORANGUI: There's something to be said about discomfort and how discomfort, how challenge, how struggle smooths the stone. There's something.

AUBREY: Yeah. So there's a truth to that. There's a truth to the myth, as with most myths.

PORANGUI: Yeah. I mean, we've talked about this before, like I've never learned that more so, and really embodied that out of just having to go through the fucking portal as going through ceremony and dancing as a sun dancer. It's like, that's shown me like, wow. It's not for everybody. And why do we do this? Why inflict suffering? Why by choice go through that degree of discomfort? And it's non-logical, it's not a simple thing that I can put into language, but if I were to attempt, it's that when I step through the other side, there's something that inherently comes through in that journey of stepping through that portal of struggle and of facing my mortality and of literally having to go through the most intense pain, one that I can imagine. 

AUBREY: Can you tell people who haven't listened to our last previous podcast? Just a brief synopsis of what the sun dance entails. People are like, oh, dancing in the sun. I'll do that every day. No you won't. 

PORANGUI: No. Yeah. It's a ceremony. It's a very sacred ceremony that comes from the Lakota people. That has been shared also with other tribes, specifically where I danced with the Dene people, with the Navajo elders, who hold the chanupa, who was passed to them from Crow dog. So it's in the same lineage as the Lakota hold it, and the specific prayer that we hold in our dance. 'cause each Sundance can have different, how to put it? Like an overarching intention or prayer that's being held by the whole ceremony. And sometimes, historically, that's been for preparing warriors. This one specifically is, is one for healing and peace and unity. And so it's a very unique kind of, if you will. But this ceremony is essentially a nine day ceremony, four days of purification where we're purifying our bodies, our minds, our hearts, and we're going through various activities, working, sweating every day, building and preparing the arbor. And this whole ceremonial grounds. And then we have four days of dancing, where as a sun dancer, we are asked, it's a commitment of no food, no water dancing from sunrise to sunset. Doing purification lodge, sweat lodge, I think a lot of people know by that, inipi ceremony, two rounds in the morning, two rounds at night at the rising before the rising sun and after the setting sun. And then–

AUBREY: Imagine, that's an incredibly intense experience, but doing that without water, 

PORANGUI: No water, in the desert at the peak of summer solstice. So yeah, this 4th of July, I'll be out there. When everyone's celebrating Independence Day, I'll be out there praying for y'all. Praying for all of us.

AUBREY: Well, you're celebrating your own independence in a way. It's independence from the scrambling away from the suffering in the running, from the discomfort. And this is something that I notice in myself, any kind of mild fatigue or boredom, I'm like, oh, I could have a little tobacco now and that'll fix it. Let me reach some caffeine that'll fix that. Or even, a healthier practice. I'll do some breath work and get me outta this. But sitting, accepting, surrendering to discomfort. That practice is invaluable. That practice is undeniably invaluable. And this is the most extreme example of teaching you how to do this because it's not a mild discomfort. 

PORANGUI: No. 

AUBREY: The desire to drink is a significant discomfort. And then, of course–

PORANGUI: And hunger. 

AUBREY: And the hunger. And then the piercing though, then becomes the acute discomfort.

PORANGUI: So one of the ways that part of the prayer is we make a flesh offering. And that's in the form of a piercing. And how we do that depends on your prayer and how the individual dancer wants to pray everything from, yeah, there's various ways. I won't get into those details, but essentially we make that offering and that offering, there's a lot of misunderstanding, and people hear about it and they think, oh, that's very barbaric. Or why, all of these things. And there's so much nuance, in depth, in ways, things that I can't even talk about here out of honor of the tradition. But what I can say is that this is an offering, especially for men. Historically, men are sun dancers. And it's a way that we honor the feminine. It's a way that we honor the life that women give through the pain and suffering. Like there's no lightweight. I mean, we have anesthetics and we have all these different ways to basically not feel the birth, but the way the body and intelligence and the technology of life herself is through the portal of the most incredible pain. That as a man will never know, that only the women know, only our mothers, only our sisters and our beloveds and our daughters. And so it's something that as men, this ceremony literally is this very ancient technology and intelligence and wisdom that puts us through that process of humbling ourselves so much to the earth, to the mother, and then to our beloveds, to our families, to our communities that we can literally embody and understand a deeper humility of really what it takes to really bring life. And so there's a prayer, there's a song that we sing in Lakota that is the piercing round prayer. And this song has very simple lyrics, but the translation essentially I do this creator so that I may live. And every time, I feel that it just that song when you hear it, it is like when we sing it, it's a song that's sung when people pass on to the other side. It's a song that that sung when there's such immense pain and hardship and you need that strength, that calls that deepest strength within us to step forward and to service and to bring that strength, that resilience that is like, that is the force, the primorial force of like what gives us the dignity, that makes us sentient beings.

AUBREY: Yeah. 

PORANGUI: That we rise up like that in the face of that, and that's what life does. We're here because of that, even if we forget. 

AUBREY: Yeah, 

PORANGUI: And that's the piece I feel in the prayer and why I think it's important. We talk about this now in the greater context of what's happening in our country and in our world, right? Is that we're being asked, I think, as human beings to really rise up through this immense hardship. And really step into our correct relation as human beings, as a species on this planet, as stewards of this earth. 

AUBREY: Yes, indeed. And just to finish what this piercing is, you actually have your own carved wooden pieces that you slice little incisions in your chest, or you could do it in your back in different ways. And I don't know, maybe you can take it from here and just quickly, so people wondering what piercing is, it's not getting a new earring.

PORANGUI: Yeah. It's not a new earring. It's not like that. It's really being mindful of how much I can share in a good way. 'cause I don't want people to misunderstand, but yeah. Different ways that we do this. We pierce and the wood that we prepare in which each of us, each dancer prepares their own piercings. Essentially two spikes, if you will, of wood and choke cherry traditionally. And we bring that through one way. And the way that I've done it is through my chest and through the fascia essentially. And so that is connected. And then we have a harness that we also weave. And that harness then is placed onto us and is tied to the central tree that we pray with the tree of life. And from that, we dance with that tree connected to it until the moment when we're ready to be released. And so we break by dancing away from the tree in four rounds. 

AUBREY: So we pull the–

PORANGUI: We pull it.

AUBREY: Until it breaks through the skin.

PORANGUI: Until it breaks free from the skin. And so that's really releasing that energy, releasing all of that energy and that attachment to the physical form in that moment. It's the death, it's a form of death. 

AUBREY: There's so many people who talk about the virtue of this discomfort. Myself being one, Joe Rogan's another, even David Goggins to a certain degree. One of the reasons why people love him, and anybody who does an ultra marathon, or there's so many ways to do this, Wim Hoff is everybody who follows him. The idea of getting into the freezing cold, the reason why we climbed Mount Shaka with our shirts off, and the freezing sleeting blizzard, and the reason why we do these things is also in its own way to teach this. And there's many, many ways that we can do this, but it is such an essential thing and it's a thing that as I progress, I realize I've always been one to comfortable, comfortable, comfortable. All right. Enough of that, let me go do something extreme, whether a really hard workout or a freezing cold thing, or a sweat lodge, or a hard ceremony. And then it's comfortable, comfortable, comfortable. I still haven't been able to translate. Like I'll have the courage that kind of warrior's courage to show up when I'm really ready to do it. But then in the intermediate times, that's not there. I'm just scrambling from one more comfortable thing to another more comfortable thing. And I think a big part of where I'm going is to just really be okay with the banality of discomfort in life. I feel like the extreme thing, even the Sundance, I don't have a feeling and I'm not saying that I'm doing it, nor am I fully invited or anything like that. But if the thought of doing it doesn't make me feel like, oh, I could never do that. Because I feel like in those acute circumstances, I have the strength to rally for something that intense. Like I trust myself when I'm pushed up against it. I've seen what comes forward. And that's like a part of me that I know. But then if you're gonna ask me what I'm gonna do at four o'clock on a Wednesday when I'm a little bit sleepy, can I handle it? I'm like, nah, I can't handle it. And that's the interesting paradox of where I'm at. And I think one of the descriptions of suffering is resistance to discomfort, resistance to pain that's suffering. There's the sensation and then there's the resistance to the sensation, which creates the suffering. And this is the fundamental cause of a lot of my suffering, is resistance to whatever thing that I'm feeling. And I know that more of these practices I need to transcend. Recently in the studio, and this is another thing we'll get to, recently in the studio, I took some psilocybin, mushroom chocolate, to help me get in the flow to offer this spoken word to this amazing album. But I've been resistant to do mushroom journeys 'cause they're uncomfortable. I purge strange liquid outta my eye and that goes in my sinuses and I get nauseous lately. It's used to kind of be a blast. It's like, Ooh, mushrooms, this is fun. But it's been work. And so I've been like, eh, mushrooms, like, I love you, but not yet. And then I do it and I'm like, man. And then I feel so much lighter and it's just like going through that work and going through that, the tension that comes in. Like, fuck. Like that's not the only way. But pushing myself through more and more of those different ways is essential. And I'm just starting to really realize that, it's just absolutely essential for me so I can break that cycle that I'm in, of always reaching for more comfort. 

PORANGUI: Yeah, it is. It's really powerful. What Pink Floyd said in their album, I've become comfortably numb. And that lyric really always sat with me in a way, it's the conundrum, like the paradox of our modern society is that we're all seeking this. We all want this comfort. And that's the very thing that nature will never give us. 

AUBREY: Yeah. 

PORANGUI: Nature's never gonna give us comfort. We're always gonna want it and we're gonna suffer. Because we're always wanting to stay in this comfortable place. Just like when we're in the womb, we're in this such a comfortable heaven, and all of a sudden it's like water breaks and it's time and we're going, it's like it's time to go. And we all have to do that journey And life then, is this ongoing, as we're in this adult, as we go through our cycles, as human beings. We're asked to continue to step through these portals of birthing ourselves, of rebirthing ourselves. And that could look like a journey with ayahuasca. Just literally climbing the top of Kilimanjaro. Or that could be sitting with elders and going through an initiation of rites, of passage of any kind. But we've lost that in our society. In modern, I'm gonna speak to American society, we have no rites of passage. You get a driver's license and you get the ability to numb yourself out with alcohol. It's mind boggling like that. And then what we're trained, through the Greek system fraternity sororities, it's totally preparing you to be more numb, to take more of this deferring like numbing ourselves is more of the comfort. It's comforting.

AUBREY: Of course.

PORANGUI: Right? But it's at the cost of not feeling alive. Not being alive. And that disconnect right there, I feel is at the core of a lot of our sickness in our society and sickness that I feel, sickness that I think we all are going through living in this society. Even when we do all this work. It's like, 'cause we're still in that context of denial and survival and scarcity. That whole context is leaving us more of the same. 

AUBREY: And it's not just the intoxicants. I mean food is another comfort, right? I mean, absolutely mean this way, again, this is an idea that I got from Charles Eisenstein that makes sense. A lot of people are reaching for food as a way to love themselves. They're loving themselves through food and through this pleasure reaching for comfort in one way, but also nourishing some sense of, I need something. And then, potentially because of their feeling of being small and their self-rejection, they're actually subconsciously becoming larger, enlarging the thing that they can enlarge, which is their body when they really want to enlarge their spirit. But it's all been kind of warped and there's so many different ways, whether it's food or whether it's intoxicants or whether it's anything that we just reach for something that we think is going to feed us. But it doesn't. It's like we really want, it's a piece of fruit, but we're taking sucralose, which is gonna give us cancer ultimately in the end, just because we need that sweet. And it's kind of sweet, but it's not the thing that we're actually looking for. It's not the thing that can actually feed us and the food that we even think is food.

PORANGUI: Actually it isn't, right? The soil's been impoverished or we're using so much roundup now. So the actual nutrient–

AUBREY: Yeah, the glyphosate. 

PORANGUI: The glyphosate. This is like such a big deal, like on the planetary level. So we're trying to fill this emptiness, this disconnect that creates this void. And so we try to fill it, fill it, fill it, and it's insatiable and everything, every single system that we have kind of to interact with from our social media to the way that we go to a store, the way we do retail therapy. Reach out to buy more stuff.

AUBREY: It’s the same thing. 

PORANGUI: And it's just more emptiness. We're trying to fill this thing and finds connection. And it's just creating this greater void, this deeper emptiness, deeper disconnect. And so I feel that therein lies this piece that we're being invited to look at is how do we change our context? How do we really start to step into a context that is about connectedness, that is about being in tune with our emotions? Which is such a big thing. A lot of this is like suppressing emotion or trying to just kind of keep the emotions at bay rather than feeling the emotions and moving the emotions. Because emotion is this energy in motion. And that's why I always try to talk about music and the power of music and dance because when we start to move our body, that is the best medicine to move all of these feelings. If you can put it into form and literally express it through some form of vibration, you don't have to be a musician or dancer. It's like the old African proverb. If you can walk, you can dance. If you can talk, you can sing. That's medicine. And a dear sister Samantha Sweetwater, Samantha, I think you know her well. She says this and I really appreciate that. And she says, I believe it's a saying from an old proverb from Curandero that says, when did you forget to take joy in singing? When did you forget to take joy in dancing? When did you forget to take joy in the stories of yourself and others? When you answer that question, when you look at that, that's the path back. 

AUBREY: This is the signature of, to me, the true spiritual master is play. And we had this conversation when we were doing a body work session recently, and this is another thing we'll get to, I promise we're gonna get to all these different things, but ultimately, I've always seen that you can tell a spiritual master by the sound of their laughter. That's always something I've said, and it's just this kind of playfulness and even this rascal nature. You hear stories from Ram Dass about his guru Maharaji. He's just throwing fruit and he's saying comments and he's being a rascal because there's this playfulness. If he's there and he's fully embodied as his divine self in his atman, in his godhead, then it is gonna be fun. It is gonna be laughs. It's not gonna be all fucking serious. We're here to play. We're here to play in these bodies and live in this way. And that's the signature. So anybody out there, you see someone who's way too serious. They don't get it. They don't get it. Like the play, the laughter, the joy–

PORANGUI: So important.

AUBREY: The singing, the dancing, it's everything. This is it, this is the why. And sure they may have great wisdom if they're super serious or all of these things. It's not to denigrate that expression, but play is the essential nature of what we're going for. This is home. 

PORANGUI: There’s a sacredness to–

AUBREY: Absolutely 

PORANGUI: To playfulness and humor is just on the other. The veil is so thin between humor and grief. Between tear and laughter. It's so thin. So when we move with laughter, the tears of laughter, it's so beautiful. And this has been studied, right? The different tears have different chemical compositions, it's like our bodies reign its own water. It's expressing. So when people try to wipe away the tears, suppress that emotion. It's like, take those tears and like, bless yourself. Put it on your body. Like literally gift yourself this, this anointing. You say that about laughter and I was just thinking about our chief, up at the dance and First Lady, they're always cracking jokes. Like, that's the thing. Like, we're in this super serious moment of a ceremony, and then they're like, crack some joke. You're like, did he just do that? And everyone's just, you just feel it, right? Because like, they know, it's like they know the importance that we bring that lightness and levity. 'cause in the end, it's all a great play. 

AUBREY: Yeah.

PORANGUI: It's a great play. And in all cultures, that's something I see cross-culturally through all the places and with different elders that I've been able to sit with and study with, they always bring that laughter 'cause they know that's the core, that's a core piece of the mystery.

AUBREY: Yeah. And that humor and that laughter and that play, everything has gotten so serious. It's one side versus the other side, red versus blue masks versus not. Vax is versus not. It's versus versus versus. And people are putting themselves in this constant state of battle. And sure there is a time for battle. There is a time to bring everything you have, but how and in what way? And like really that idea that you need to fight something. Sometimes. But mostly you just need to live in the example of what you're fighting for, which is the joy and the acceptance and the love. Like you're trying to attack something who's attacking and is supposing that that's going to solve the attacking. It’s not. But if we really want–

PORANGUI: More the same. 

AUBREY: Yeah. It's more the same. If we really want to show up as warriors of light, play, laugh, don't take anything seriously, I'm gonna do a podcast.

PORANGUI: Especially yourself. 

AUBREY: Especially yourself. That's where it gets real. And your beliefs and your ideas. And just play all that lightly. Be passionate about it, but also carry laughter with you wherever you go. No matter what you do, that should be part of your scent. Part of your signature, part of your vibration is that there's a smile and a laugh and a hug, like right there. Always one little breath away 

PORANGUI: When things are so heavy, it's really important. And my medicine is that when I'm feeling so down and so bent, it's like I just gotta laugh at myself. And sometimes the laughter turns into tears and it's so healing. So healing and so moving, having practices to move that emotional energy is essential in that whole dance. Is being able to have different practices. One of the things is like the ecstatic dance practice. We've talked about a lot and over the years, I know the very first ecstatic dance when–

AUBREY: No doubt 

PORANGUI: There at the ranch with Ashley facilitating. And myself with music and getting to hold that space like you feel the importance of the sacredness when we are able to let go and even be, I believe we did the blindfold. We did the blindfold, the first one. So we will do a blindfold. So you're not in that. I'm looking, oh, am I cool? Am I looking at someone else? Although they're dancing better than me and all that inner critic.

AUBREY: Yeah, all that comparison. 

PORANGUI: It’s just move your body and it doesn't matter. And just explore new ways to move your body, ways you've never moved. And when we do that, something happens where those bricks, which we might call beliefs, these bricks, and it's stuck in this mortar made of emotion. We start to move that emotion. All of a sudden these beliefs start to get loose. And what was a wall of belief systems that we've been holding dearly our whole life suddenly starts to become soft and placid and all of a sudden you can push it in like a window forms. You're like, holy shit. I've been in this prison of beliefs that are just, who created this? Like–

AUBREY: You did. 

PORANGUI: You did. Exactly. 

AUBREY: You did. And the dream of the world–

PORANGUI: You inherited some of these. 

AUBREY: Of course. I mean, we learn the game, we learn conditional love in the prison of conditional love. And this is the deepest prison of the mall. This is the one that we're all in. And this is something as much as I'm aware of the nature of unconditional love. And the love that holds no record of wrong. And the way God's favorite joke is two, because there's just one and it's all God. Like Two? What? It says God. Like where? Like it's God. It's God everywhere. And it's this idea that–

PORANGUI: God beating God. 

AUBREY: Exactly. And–

PORANGUI: God wanted somebody to jam with. 

AUBREY: For sure. It's like, yeah, 

PORANGUI: So I was like, I'm just gonna do this.

AUBREY: And dance and play–

PORANGUI: Now you can play 

AUBREY: In all of the different ways. It's beautiful. But you understand this at that level. Like, I get it man. I fucking get it. And I felt it. And I've been there and I know what that love feels like and I know God and I know that is true and I've felt it, man. And I've felt it. God. Love. Like I know it. And then I spend the rest of my day. This conditional love, oh my God, I don't know if this person's gonna, what are they gonna think? And, oh, am I doing the right thing? Am I doing enough now? Now I have more resources. Am I deploying them in the right way? Did I spend enough time preparing for this? Did I do that? And I'm still judging myself constantly. Just constantly. And then–

PORANGUI: Remember the antidote?

AUBREY: Yeah. And that was it. And so this was something I shared with you recently, and we'll go through this. So this'll be a segue. The last little bit about my own challenges. So we go into a body work session, which I was blessed to apprentice with you as well. And I can't wait to share that and we'll talk about that. But at the start, there's kind of an intake, like a moment where we connect and as I mentioned, this has been an interesting, challenging time. Because I'm being called to the chrysalis. I'm being called to the cave to hibernate. And I've been pushing it off for so long, so yeah, sure. But it's time. It's fucking time. And I know that, and things are building, things are coming, and it's like, all right,

PORANGUI: You got this.

AUBREY: I got this. But anyways, we go in and you ask, what are you feeling? And I was like, all right. I feel this pressure, this thing, and it's above my heart. And you say, “okay, what's its shape?” And I thought, you said, what's its shame? And I go, “what's its shame?” And you're like,” no, no, I said, what's its shape?” And I said, “oh, okay. Well, it's like two pieces of armor that go out, kind of like dragonfly wings. And they're like metal.” And you're like, “okay, what's your shame?” And I go, “oh man.” And I was like, at first I was like nothing. That's what I thought. I was like, I'm not ashamed of anything. Shame. I've gotten rid of that a long time ago. I'm fucking Aubrey Marcus. I'm not ashamed. Shame is not for me. And then I was like, and just sitting in deeper and I take a little cannabis for these sessions. This is kind of my session medicine. So I'm just sitting deeper breathing. And then this emotion starts to well up. And I realize, oh man, I'm ashamed that I don't fully love myself. I don't love myself. And I've talked about self-love. I've had podcasts on self-love, and this is why the shame is there. Because I know better. In my mind, that's what I say, you know better. You should love yourself. You should love yourself. There's the judge again. And that's the reason that I don't love myself, is the judge. The judge is judging me for not loving myself. Again, it's this fractal denial of love–

PORANGUI: You don't love.

AUBREY: Yeah. You don't love yourself. Oh, I can't believe you don't love yourself. You know better, denying more love and back. And then I can go back and back and back. And judging the judge who judges the judge, who judges the judge. 

PORANGUI: It's the hell.

AUBREY: It’s hell. It's the infinite loop of judgment. 

PORANGUI: Yeah.

AUBREY: And it was really deep to just feel like, oh man, this is the way. And whenever I connect with my higher self, my soul, whatever you want to call it, nomenclature gets confusing for people. But that, the unborn, the undying part of me that I know is always there.

PORANGUI: Yeah. The witness. 

AUBREY: I say, what should I do?

When I ask, when I pray, please like gimme some guidance. It's always the same. It's always the same. My soul says, love yourself. Completely. Completely. I'm like, okay. Simple in idea, very difficult, because that means the complete removal of judgment entirely. And to do that, you have to also radically accept and love the judge and surrender.

You can't be judging the judge. You have to love everything. Love that aspect of yourself. Yeah. That judges yourself until you love it so much that it no longer carries any weight, you've just disarmed it entirely. Love every aspect. In this you shared, and I'll let you share the antidote.

The antidote, and I'll let you share this 'cause this landed really deep. So I say, 

PORANGUI: so I ask him, I'm like, so let me give you a spell, an algorithm, an antidote to aha. The self judge, the inner judge, the inner critic, which I sometimes talk about. It's like the Sacred clowns, the shadow aspect.

Whereas the light aspect is discernment. The shadow is this, this inner critic, this continuous judge. And so you ask it, it says, oh Aubrey, you should love yourself. You're doing a shitty job. And then what do you say to it? You say, so what? So what so fucking what moment you say that? Just feel it in your body.

So what? Oh, you sing outta tune. So what? So what? It's so fucking powerful. All of a sudden it's like, ah, yeah, there's this little, it just breaks this thing and it literally leaves space for all of a sudden you can feel like, oh yeah, wow. I can just shed that. And it just, you take 

AUBREY: your power back, back in this way, right?

It's like the judge has been this huge looming force, this overpowering the, this, this shadow father, this Jehovah that we've projected from our own judgment, right? All of a sudden we stand up and we look eye to eye. And instead of cowering, because this thing holds, the bounty of love and only trickles a little bit out.

We just look right in the eye and say, so what? So what?

PORANGUI: and then it's so what? It's like, 

AUBREY: oh, all right. Yeah. And it puts us on the same level. And, it's such a powerful practice. Ah, I should have prepared more. I can't believe I did.

PORANGUI: So 

AUBREY: what, 

PORANGUI: So what? Show up? And as soon as you, so what. What's the second half of that? Do you remember? No. Share it. Play, keep playing. Oh yeah, of course. Yeah. I mean that's, that's what get back in the game. Get back. That's where we gotta, yeah. Get back. So it's, and it's this invitation because the inner critic, right?

So this is something we do a lot. Like, so when, when I do the music as medicine retreats where we take this beautiful group of humans who, many of them don't have musical or, or have these stories and these beliefs, their inner critics are so strong. Maybe an adult or someone else. Another relative told 'em when they were little, you can't sing or you can't do that.

You're not a musician. Oh you sound terrible. All of those little stories. So they come with that, even though they don't even remember, they have that. Because everyone, we, we show up and they had the courage to show up. And so we're in this work and literally in the work of creating music and doing circle songs and doing this technology that we do in the retreat of just remembering what it is to have a voice and to be heard and to be witnessed in your authentic expression with no pre-thought, with no preparation, literally get into flow state.

So this is like the flow dojo. And so we're in this work with each other and it's amazing to watch people just get paralyzed and crippled by that inner critic. You can just see it like you can feel it. They're disconnected all of a sudden. And so when I give them that, so what. And just to see them literally like in the middle of the circle and be like, so what?

And right away it's like you get better and better at bringing your So what in a way that you then get to this ability to where any time that hiccup comes in, the moment you get into your mind and separation happens and it knocks you outta flow state, you're then able to get right back up on your board and keep going.

And that's the idea is that the more you do this, the more you're just able to be. So what,okay, I'm in it, I'm in it, I'm in it. Oh shit, I fucked up. So what? Keep going. I'm in it, I'm in it, I'm in it. Yeah, totally. So it's literally this dance and it gets to where it's just second nature.

And I can say this because I feel that, and not that I don't have moments of big inner critic. When I am able to really get outta the way, which I'm able to do, and I do this like when we're in these moments where we're jamming. When we're just playing music, it's, for me, that's one of the places where this happens.

I've gotten to this place and so I know it's possible and that's why I say this to all of us. It's literally a point where you are so fluid. You have this fluidity about the, not that the inner critic and the judge isn't gonna come up and you're not gonna have that thing pop in, but that when it does your ability to be in the so what about it?

And just keep moving with it and just turn that into a new idea, a new piece of compost for the next creation is so fast that all of a sudden it's like you're just constantly living in this state. More than not. And that's really, I believe a goal. It's something I believe we all can strive for.

AUBREY: Oh, a hundred percent. And every really successful person that I know, well, not everyone maybe, but most of them being around athletes and through on and through my mother, who is a professional athlete, particularly in that realm, if you start to judge and dwell on, and even myself as a basketball player, if you start to judge and dwell on your last shot or your last throw, if you're a quarterback or 

the backhand that you hit in tennis. If you dwell on that at all, you're fucked. It's done. You're done. Like it has to be completely over. And it's funny 'cause especially in racket sports, more than anything, I think, 'cause there's time in between 'em and I don't know, maybe it's just the people who are attracted to 'em.

Like even playing pickleball now and people will take it real seriously. I've known this from playing and being around, and I have my own issues with the judge, but it doesn't come out in the sports because I know that if I really get down on myself, it's just gonna do it. So you just laugh.

Like, you just laugh. Like, wow, that was a fucking awful shot. You just chuckle and you just smile. You gotta just laugh. And then I watch other people and they'll start beating themselves up. Come on, wow, what are you? And I'm like, oh, you're done now.

Like you're done. Like this is, this is it. And we do that in life. There's another incredibly successful. Successful commodities trader, and my dad would tell me stories about 'em. Apparently they were young and single at the time. They went out to a bar or a club or whatever it was back then.

And he goes up to this model looking, my dad says she looked like a model and he's just an ordinary guy from Virginia, a normal guy. And he has his glasses and he goes up and he asked her to dance or asked her for a drink. And apparently she was like, impossibly rude.

She was like, I would never have a drink with you if there were no more drinks available on the whole planet. Okay, get lost. And my dad, who had a real strong judge, like really strong. My dad was horrified, like, holy shit. That was the harshest rejection I've ever 

PORANGUI: seen. 

AUBREY: Didn't say anything.

They just kind of kept cruising around. And at the end of the night, my dad apparently goes to him and says, man, that was really rough what happened with that woman you went up and talked to. And his friend was like, what? What do you mean oh yeah, that, he didn't even remember.

He didn't even remember it. It didn't even phase him, not one bit. He didn't take on that rejection and then allow his judgment to judge himself for how he appeared or what he said he did. None of that. It was just like, oh yeah, whatever. That's her story. That's she's in, that's in her dream.

That's not in my dream. Right. And that guy has become one of the most successful humans on the planet. And I've always remembered that story because these things that we think are like these crushing defeats and these crushing rejections, if we allow them to be, if we want that to be part of our story, if we allow that to harness to our own self, to our own judge, totally.

Then it is if, if not, it's not, and we just continue to play and it's like, oh yeah, that thing. Well that was weird. She's in a weird dream. 

PORANGUI: Yeah. 

AUBREY: And we have that power. We do. It's a choice. It's a choice. It's a choice. We have to practice. We have to practice it. Yeah. It is, yeah. Practice makes the master of everything.

That's it. 

PORANGUI: Laughter play. So what? Laughter play. So what? And just stay in that. Yeah. And be in that as, as often as you can. And it's important to, I think just to say it, it's not being flippant with the state of the world. With the state of our being with it's, so that's the two sides of the judge.

Discernment. I. Versus that self judge, inner critic. The heka has these two sacred shadow light, and dark aspects. The dark one being that crippling self-judgment that literally stops the flow of life. The other being the discernment, like we talked about in the lyrics. The sword.

It's that sword that cuts away, right? It's the discernment between what is illusion and what is truth. 

AUBREY: Yep. 

PORANGUI: And so that's the light aspect of that hay hook of the play of the clown. 'cause you have that mastery to totally be working with truth and dancing with truth. And you see all the illusion and you're playing, you get the illusion and it's the joke, the illusion's the greatest joke of all.

Yeah. 

AUBREY: And for people who don't know haka, maybe just explain the haka and the role of the haka in the Lakota tradition and some of the things that they'll even do at a Sundance, for example. 

PORANGUI: Well, yeah. So Haka, Heka is, a sacred clown would be the closest translation that I've been explained. They're known as the Sacred Clown and they are sacred and clown in a sense that they are sacred individuals within the people and all peoples have different, this archetype exists.

I've seen in many different cultures, and we have them in our culture. Wasn't Crazy Horse Kayoka. I, 

AUBREY: I, 

PORANGUI: I think 

AUBREY: Crazy Horse was IA too. 

PORANGUI: It's possible. 

AUBREY: Like a, it's like a gift from the tribe to give this kind of, it's an honor.

PORANGUI: Well, yeah. It is an honor. Honor. It is a big honor.

And it's not something you're gifted. So the way that I've been explained is that it's something that you're not, you can't choose this. It's something you're born and people recognize it like they see it. So for instance, one of the ways people are struck by lightning often. Heka, they become heka.

Like that's one of the things, it's a tough, it's a tough criteria. It's tough. Yeah, yeah. Just saying like, there's things like this that aren't like clear cut. But the way this works is that the heka, they have the ability, so in a ceremony, there's very specific ways in life.

There's very specific ways we move, say, in a clockwise manner. So they're allowed to work in the opposite, and they will go in the opposite direction. Their responsibility, in fact, is to go in the opposite direction. That's their sacred responsibility is to move things and to break the norms, and to shake things up, and to kind of stir everything so that again, we don't take ourselves too seriously.

So in the ceremony, you ask in Sundance, so one example is when they come. And they're in the ceremony with us and they dance with us, and they go through everything, but they don't have to abide by the same rules. So, and they don't, and that's their responsibility. So their sacred response, for instance, we're out there, day three, day four, like no water, no food.

We're just like going through it and in our prayer, and we're in our dance and this is the thing. Their job is to make sure, are you really praying? Are you really in your dance? And so they'll come up to us sometimes and they'll taunt us and tease us. Like they'll come up right in front of you with watermelon and be like, eat that watermelon right in front of your face, and just say, Hey, are you really in it?

And you cannot, it's literally they're holding that pillar of that mirror showing you like, okay, what part of you is not really in your prayer? What part of you is thinking about food or water? Or thinking about how soon is this gonna be over? Or thinking about whatever distraction it's really asking you, are you able to be totally in your prayer and just.

'cause if you are, when we're there, you have to be in your prayer. If you're not, you're suffering. If you're in your prayer, the suffering falls away and you just become the prayer. Yeah. That's why I always tell you when, when I'm out there, you come to me. Every single individual that has been in my life is there with me.

All the unborn children, they're there with me. I feel all of them. I feel every single being. They come to me and I see all their faces. And if that's literally what you're doing for those 12 hours. You're just in it. And as I'm doing, I'm watching the clouds and the cloud people, cloud nation, they come and they're showing me all these different visions.

It's so beautiful in that way, and it's really. If you can stay in your prayer, it's the most beautiful experience. 

AUBREY: Yeah. 

PORANGUI: If you don't, and there's moments when you're like, ah, that's it. But the key is to come back into that. And so their sacred role is that heka is to really test you and make sure you're really 

AUBREY: in it.

And it's such a. Beautiful concept because these rituals and things they can get, they can calcify and become stagnant and become all too serious. And you can forget that this is a way that you're learning how to play better. This is a way that you're learning this way to appreciate. But if you forget the play and if you don't have something that breaks up that stagnation, it can become this dogmatic thing that's all, too serious and out of alignment.

So just having that gentle reminder, stirring the other direction. 

PORANGUI: Sometimes it's not gentle, sometimes it's not. Sometimes the haku will literally drag somebody or pull somebody's skirt down or do crazy things, like things that it's gnarly. So it keeps us, you really stay in your awareness.

You don't check out. I would just say the equivalent in our modern society, which I think is important to acknowledge. Like the heka would be those who maybe in our society we would say they have a mental disorder. We'd call them bipolar or manic, or this, that.

We'd give them a diagnosis. Give them some kind of drugs and then put 'em in an institution. In the traditional cultures, they were exalted. They were honored because they have certain superpowers, they have sensitivities, they have insights, they're psychic. 

We don't want to hear that. And so in that same way, it's such an interesting parallel. I've reflected on a lot. In our society, we don't want that. We want things to, we all need to drive on this side of the road and we all need to go to work. 

AUBREY: Not believe, feel that the same thing.

And if you don't believe the same thing, you're an enemy. And if someone says something to you that triggers you, then it's let's cut them off. Let's boundaries. Exactly. I see this in the spiritual community, put in prison, put all the time, it's like, oh, nope. I gotta get my boundaries and blah, blah, blah.

And they use this kind of language to actually. Push judgment and push these things that actually might rub them in a way that could be their opportunity for growth. And they just start exiling all of these different aspects. And sometimes that's necessary. But if you took and said, everybody who triggers me is, Hey, YOKA is like, this is what they're doing.

This is their thing. They're the sacred clown from you right now. Because obviously I'm not, yeah. I'm not, I'm not getting it right now. I'm taking myself too seriously. I'm taking this dream too seriously and they're getting to me, and this is something MDAs talks about, like I, he lived in New York because New York was the place that got to him the most.

Because it was the most busy and there was the most intense dream and that helped remind him. It was hard for him. So the whole city, was he a heka for him? And so he was like, great. And they would play games where they would try to challenge each other and trigger each other in ways.

It's just like as a way to say like, am I really. Do I really get it right now or is there a fear, a scarcity, an insecurity, a doubt. And my ego showing up in some way and just getting all of these little tests. But if we look at our whole life like that, it just changes the way that we look at everybody.

It's like, oh, thank you. Person who honked at me aggressively. Even though I didn't even cut you off and you didn't even have to hit the brakes, like, thank you. I appreciate that. Because it made a little flush in my body. 

PORANGUI: You helped me stay aware. You helped me be present and gimme me opportunity to show up with equanimity, to show up with love and compassion in the face of hardship.

And that's full spiral. Back to our conversation about how discomfort helps actually can liberate us if we can hold it in that way. Yeah. There's a liberation through the challenge. There's a strengthening, there's that metal on metal like we talked about, right? Like the sword on sword.

There's something about that we need, Ah, iron sharpens iron. Iron sharpens iron helps us to be better humans and better leaders and better way shores. Yeah. 

AUBREY: So let's talk about this practice. I've referenced body work. We talked about the intake aspect of it. This is something I experienced from you and I have experienced from you for, I don't know, eight, 10 years now.

PORANGUI: Gosh, long time. 

AUBREY: Eight, maybe nine. And it's been something that always, I've worked with a lot of different practitioners, a lot of different things. It's been consistently the most otherworldly experience outside of a psychedelic journey of some sort that I've experienced.

It's this really unique, and I'll pass it over to you to explain it, but it's this very unique combination of working with the soma, the body, the tissue, the fascia, and then working with the ORIC field, the ethereal body, the energy field. But most of the time that I've experienced anybody working on the energy field, it's like I feel like somebody's pantomiming something.

And I've even done it, I've even participated as a pantomime. Like I'm doing something good here. I watched it on a Reiki video once, or somebody did this and I'm gonna pantomime swirling your chakras and it's gonna be dope. Right? And I was like, gotcha, didn't I? And they're like, yeah, it was great.

I was like, but I've never actually really felt it. And I think that's, except when I was working with you. And then it was like, no, no, no. This is real. Like this is real. And it validated the whole field for me of like, okay, there's something else here. And the balance, the combination of working with the soma and the aura that was, that is this really unique piece in how you approach it.

So I'll pass it over to you. This is my experience of it, it is, like a restoration of your original blueprint as a being. That's what I feel like when I experience this. 

Yeah. Beautiful. 

PORANGUI: Yeah. So this work that has been coming through, my ELA lineage of healers, of Salvador, 

and they were traditional, which means those who work with their hands to rub. So like there's eros, there's bone setters like your chiropractor would be the modern version of that. And those who would work with the hands to work with the connective tissues and the muscle tissues.

But really what we're working with connective tissues, 'cause when we get down to it, even in the muscle, if you really were to dissect all of it and look at the whole being, each strand is wrapped in its own sheath of fascia and that's wrapped in a greater sheath of fascia. And all of that fascia is one continuous web that flows throughout the entire body and it's intelligent.

When we talk about the soma, what I'm referring to is this innate intelligence, this body inner web that carries intelligence and communication and a consciousness of its own. That in some ways, I believe, predates, if you will, the consciousness that we talk about. 

when we're talking about consciousness, there's like this emergent quality that for me is an emergent quality of the body, of the body's own being and its intelligence. It's been here since the beginning. This is along this whole dance. And so what we're doing, what I'm, when we're working in this, and when I say we, it's because I'm never alone in this.

Whenever I'm there, it's like I'm there with other beings that are assisting me. I'm there with your guides and your helpers that are assisting. I'm there with the body, my body, and it's a conversation between these two, but somas that are dancing in a field that is connected in so many ways that we're still scratching the surface of.

So I'm in this dance, and so I'm asking permission and I'm literally then tuning into my breath, entraining, my breaths, your breath and entrainment. We're talking about this incredible phenomenon where things, different cycles, different systems that appear to not be in sync will then come into sync with each other.

Inherently, like pendulum, clocks all set to different times. It's been measured over and over again, right? They eventually all sync up. You walk back in the room, you're like, what? Women's moon cycles, right? They start hanging out together. All of a sudden, all the women will actually sync up their moon cycle.

That's like total magic, right? Various examples. Well, that might be pheromones. Pheromones may be connected to this, right? Yeah, for sure. But it's a thing in various systems. I mean, there's biological systems and non-biological systems that entrain, and so this entrainment, we create this.

So I start to breathe and sink into a synchronicity and entraining with your breath. And then together our two breaths tracking the energy. Our bodies then are able to communicate when there is contraction and where there is expansion. And the dance is literally being able to read the body, using that and using vibration to ask conversation.

Have a conversation that's non-linguistic with the body. So I'm able to then use breath, use vibration to a sonar, to create space, to ask if there is space to see what's happening. And then from that place, invite your body when you're going into more parasympathetic state if it wants to self-organize.

And so I offer a pattern, a rhythm, and I'm basically asking it. I mean, and this is using words for something that's really hard to put into words, but essentially if I were to try to articulate it, it's like I'm offering a blueprint of self-organization that I can sense that I, it's telling me, Hey, here's the shoulder that I injured.

15 years ago, and I had wore a sling for a year and it's been healed all this time, but this pattern has been there in my soma that's still holding this thing. And there's an emotion charge that's there that my amygdala imprinted in me back then from the fear and from the pain of holding myself bracing for impact.

And here we are, we have this opportunity now to bring vibration, to bring motion and flow back into it. And I can ask it in that moment. Okay, are you ready to let go of it now? And so as we do that, what I found in all these years is that the body will always tell me the truth. The mind will say something, I'll do the intake and they'll say, oh, I have some pain here in my neck.

What does this, whatever, blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, meanwhile, I'm just asking the body, I'm watching the whole body, right? We're scanning the body, the breath, where are they holding, what are the patterns? Where's the spirals expressing itself, the distortion in the spiral of the body.

And essentially then we wanna bring that spiral back into its natural morela, the spring of life to bounce, to be resilient. It wants to do it. And so we're looking for where is that density and how do we introduce space again to that place? I hope that kind of expresses some of the Yeah. The magic. 

AUBREY: It’s very difficult thing to explain because it's meant to be felt.

It's totally felt. It's like, tell me about God. Well. All right. Tell me about music. Yeah, exactly. It's a difficult thing. It's a gnosis with a g and it's a feeling that you get, but ultimately, as I started to really understand it, as we stepped into this apprenticeship, which was really, honestly, I've learned from a lot of people and I had a lot of mentors like Don Howard and different people, and I was, brought through an initiation by a Siri elder, and so I have some experience, but this was probably the most formal apprenticeship, even though it was short and it's ongoing still that I've been through.

But as I started to switch over to the other side and see through your eyes and start to see what you're looking for and what you're doing, it was really. Interesting to start to tap in and understand that I just thought when I was receiving, okay, he's shaking my body, okay, cool, but what is that doing?

And then you're just watching these kind of patterns start to release, but also watching where they're not releasing, watching where the body is holding, where it's not moving, where it's tight. So again, that's your sonar thing that you're doing. Sometimes you'll be holding my big toes or we'll be holding toes or be holding heels and pulling, or we'll be holding thumbs and waving the arms or on the shoulders or on the hips or wherever and you just start to get a sense with the body and start to feel it.

It's a feeling that some part of it's your eyes, some part of it is your mind that's tracking their breath. But really the biggest part is coming from deep. It's your own body's intelligence, recognizing their body's intelligence. And that's where the real information comes from. And you just start to know.

You start to know what the body needs and there's certain things that you go to, there's certain things like this is generally going to be helpful. Like a sacral hold, sliding the hand under holding the sacrum. Underneath there. 'cause this is usually face up. That's generally gonna be a good idea, to kind of anchor the body back to the table.

Right. But it depends. You never, yeah. So there's like moves, but you don't know which moves. It's improvisation. Exactly. And that's where it's just like music. Exactly. So part of it was learning some of the moves. Okay. This is a sacral 

this is a cranial sacral hold. Okay. This is Trager. This is all these tools. This is myofascial, these technique. This is all of these different things. What is the hummingbird thing that we do with these. What is this called again? 

PORANGUI: that's a clearing. I don't have a name for it. Oh, yeah. So there's all these things that are also not techniques that aren't from any, like, there's things that are just, there're moves 

AUBREY: that you have and you actually, are coming up with new moves.

You grabbed like a pillowcase The last time we were working and we're doing this thing with my head in a pillowcase. It's like, oh, snake, snake got this fucking snake thing. So it's like, some part is like learning the skills. Like these are some of the skills, but when you're actually doing it, 

you're just listening. The deepest listening. But it's like you have some phrases of how to communicate and respond to what you're hearing. If the body's like, I need this, instead of being like, well, fuck, I hear you, but I don't know what to do. Right. A big part of it was.

I hear you, and now I have these tools that are available that might be the right solution to respond to what you're saying. It's like, it's like learning 

PORANGUI: a bunch of scales, like when you're learning music. Yeah. You have to learn all these scales. You have to shed all these scales, or you have to learn all these, in martial arts, you have to learn all these different, this vocabulary of different movements, they're attacked Defenses jitsu.

Exactly. Arm bars or triangles or chokes or whatever. Yeah. But then you forget them. Yeah. The, the art form is you, then you, you surrender all of them. You let them go literally, you forget them completely. And you come back with your white belt as a total apprentice, that black belt that's been totally worn into the white and it's lost all of its paint, right?

And all the sweat from all your experience and just beginner's mind. And you ask, you ask yourself, and you ask this body non-verbally. You ask it with your full presence. How can I serve, how can I be of the greatest service? So the, for the good of all comes into a very focused prayer of how can I serve right now?

How can I fully get out of the way and be of greatest service? And then the answer comes, and it's not an answer that hits your frontal cortex. It's, and actually an answer that hits right in your heart and then ripples out through your, your limbs, which then become the limbs of creator. Mm. Well said. And you, and then you literally are there moving and working with them in this dance with their body, making music moving.

And, and it's just such a magical thing because as you move with them, with that kind of presence, it's healing and self-organizing in a level that we never experience as humans. 'cause think about it, when do we get to have another human being have their hands on our body in a non-sexual way? That was total presence with absolute presence, maybe more than a lover.

They're there only in service to help support your health and wellbeing and wholeness. And that's all. They're there for two hours or three hours or four hours in our sessions. With total presence to bring healing and support the prayer of your life. And in so doing, knowing that as I support the prayer of your life, Aubrey, I know that I'm supporting the prayer of all life, including yourself, including my own.

And that's the thing. Even though I'm touring these days, and I've stopped with Covid, I haven't been seeing clients, we did that special session for you, that apprentice. Yeah. And every time it's like, riding a bike, it's like, it's just so in me.

It's like I show up what's gonna happen. We know. The spirit's gonna guide this. And just to say, when I left our apprenticeship that we did together, I felt so reminded of like, wow, I can't stop doing this work. Even though I'm out there touring and I'm sharing my music with the world.

There's something so important for my own wholeness of why I'm here on this earth to be in service in that way. There's something so special about, it's so sacred, that it's so part of a lineage that I continue. And so it was that reminder too of teaching you and sharing you this like, oh, this is something I have to do in this lifetime.

I came here. Like, I can't, like just die with me. Definitely not, it definitely has to be passed on and transmitted to, to others, so I know that'll, that'll come that time. But, and it's also, 

AUBREY: we can get stuck again in the myth of scale. And the myth of scale is, well, if I spent this time working on music for you.

Then this could get millions of listens. Millions of people could hear this. Music could reach more people versus could reach more people. Versus if I'm just with this one person. Well that's only one person. But that's the myth. One person is every person. That's all. Every person.

Yeah. Right. And so when we can really understand that and stop saying, oh, this person's more important 'cause they reach more people, or if I do this thing, it'll reach more people than if I just sit with this one person and have this one conversation. Like that may be. Just as valuable as this one video that goes, and reaches a hundred thousand people.

Like it's really rewiring that and understanding that, we are all representatives of the whole. And yeah, it's great to push these things out to as many, and then, but it's also great to really go deep, with the individual, 

PORANGUI: like a chaos system, like in, in chaos theory, right? This notion that the butterfly wing, one movement of a butterfly wing can cause an F five.

Yeah. Hurricane. Or like this massive earth change. Yeah. Just through an avalanche. So that one conversation, that one conversation that you have with that individual that you just happen to pass by, touches them in a way, or touches you in a way that creates ripples and transformation No.

Can measure. But even then, even then, 

AUBREY: watch how the myth of force sneaks in, in your own mind. How now you're having to say that one person is affecting a lot of people. The butterfly wing is affecting the hurricane. But what if it's just a butterfly wing? What if it's just a wing? What if it's just that person?

So what, so what? And like that matters too. I mean like that myth that it has to be big is something that I think really, really traps us to say like these, A lot of people maybe, I'm sure people listening now like, oh man, I would feel good about myself if I was like Aubrey and I had a podcast of so many people with POD that reached this many people, then I would be really doing a good job.

I would be a good boy or a good girl and I would be helping. You can do that with some random person in the street, some person, one person who reaches out to you, and that's just as important as what I'm doing or what you're doing. Absolutely. Absolutely. And like that's more important.

Yeah. That's it. Be there. Show up presence. Love your dog. Like really like be there with 'em and play and like get in there. Yeah, that's beautiful. Like allow yourself, like take off this mantle of, it has to be big and it has to create, this has to look like this and it has to create this big impact.

And just say like, this is important too. And I think that's a big, I'm talking to myself of course, always, because I'm looking, I'm looking at me always. This is, yes, you want a fucking cheat code. You want a cheat code. Everything I'm telling you always and everything I create is also for me, right?

This is the fucking cheat code. This understanding is something that, it just creates so much more freedom. It creates so much more freedom. And it's not that you're gonna stop doing the big things, but it's just that you're not gonna value them more than these other things. That was the beauty that I felt when we were getting in and starting to do this work.

And why I was drawn to it. Thousands of these sessions and become a body worker in this way, a healer in this way. But to have that and to be able to gift that in certain circumstances, and I was able to, my first session that I gave after the apprenticeship, 'cause we did some together.

And first, let me explain that. During that process, while we were doing this together, I could feel myself doing the real things that you were doing. Not just the physical things, but I could feel energy moving and all the pantomiming that I'd been doing, I was like, oh my goodness, I was pantomiming all of this time.

And I don't do it that often. It's not like I'm going around re people. But every once in a while I would, and I was like, that was a charade. I wasn't really feeling it. But then, because I knew that when I was really feeling it, I knew I was doing something. 

I knew even when I wasn't touching them, even when I was.

Using the, using the feather or using what? Using my hands and not like, or just using my heart. My heart energy, 

PORANGUI: yeah. 

AUBREY: Presence. It was doing, it was really doing something. And that was, that was this really mind. It just shifted this whole paradigm of this is really real. Not only can this one wizard named Pogi offer this, but it's available and it's learnable and we're, we're all capable of this thing.

And this thing is real. This energy field, this ORIC field. I'm not into the photos that show, like I think it's just a Polaroid trick and I don't really believe most of this stuff. And I think that most people doing reiki, it's mostly pantomime, but it can be real, 

And that's the beauty of it. And. That changed so much for me, and it was such a gift, and I have so much gratitude for you to do that. And, and you can feel what happens there. And in the session that I offered, first of all I realized like, wow, this is a long journey to mastery here, 'cause the mind will get in like, oh, am I doing this right?

Like, am I listening right? Am I commu? And then you just get back into the listening, get back into the gentle rocking and your own presence. But as I was working on, this woman's shoulder and she's just a friend and we were working on this she started to weep. 

Like really weep as I was working on this, this fascia that was kind of bound in her right shoulder. And, and I was just feeling it and she was crying and I could feel that, I could feel that. Come up and I was like, oh, wow. Like this is the moment where it's different than a massage because I've given lots of massages and nobody's ever cried.

And I'm a decent masseuse, but this was different. This was different. Yeah. Because the energy was different and it was doing something different 

PORANGUI: and your energy was different. 

AUBREY: My energy was different. And it allowed the body to release this somatic storage, it was that great book.

The Body Keeps a score, something in her shoulder was keeping a score and it was some issues with the masculine that she's had and some ways that, and it was just gently allowing it to let go. And it's not that it wouldn't come back and it's, she's cured forever of her issues in that thing.

But just for that day, for that time, it just took that and allowed it to move. Yeah. Allowed it to, 

PORANGUI: That's a sacred process and responsibility and gift. As a man, especially when you're able to hold the feminine, a woman, a sister, a partner, there's something that happens when we do that in that nonsexual way, it's really, really healing.

Yeah. For the feminine to receive from a man in a nonsexual way, with total presence, with no other agenda, when they can feel literally the resonance of the safety. That they don't want something from me, which most women I've learned through my partner Ashley, so many women have this trauma ingrained from a very early age that they're being hunted, literally.

It's a very different experience on being a man, and having the privilege of being a man in our society. So it's immense, immense, immense. I cannot stress enough how important and sacred it is when we're able to create healing touch. Safety for the feminine and to do that. And when the feminine feels that resonance and feels that it's palpable.

The armor can go away and they can unfurl something so sacred and so beautiful happens, and often more than not, there's a lot of sadness and grief underneath that that just wants to be released and let go of. 

AUBREY: Yeah. 

PORANGUI: And it's so powerful. It's healing for both men and women. And it's healing not only in that moment, but literally that kind of work is healing forward and backwards.

It's healing our relationship to our mothers and our fathers. It's healing relationship to our children. It heals in multiple directions. It's really important. Yeah. And super divine. So I, I'm so happy to hear that, that it makes me proud of you. Yeah. Thank you, 

AUBREY: brother. Thank you. Yeah. That idea of the hunter and the hunted is this thing that's played out.

It's part of the dream, it's part of the story, it's part of attraction and this whole, how you attract the other mate. The men show up as I am this thing that the worthy hunter, for example, I have these things. I dress this way, I have these resources, I have these skills and I am the worthy hunter.

And a lot of times, women will show up as, and I am the one that you want to hunt. And there's this idea that it's all woven in. It's in this kind of predatory system of our relationship. And even how women wearing high heels to a certain extent, it's almost like prey that's been hobbled in a way, it is beautiful.

And I think women can wear heels and be fully empowered. Like, this is me being a badass and these are my badass heels and I'm gonna look amazing. And I'm not trying to disempower that aspect of it, but I think there is some subtle way where it's like, here I am. I'm prayed. Don't you want me. 

And the men are like, yeah, I want you, I'm a predator and I can capture you and you're surrendering your ability to run away. And I think there's kind of interesting primal dance between predator and prey. And you see this in the animal world as well. And it's the males, birds with the bright feathers maybe they're doing the dance.

And so it is this beautiful, primal thing, but it can also get kind of twisted in this way and disempowering in this way. And I think it's good to be mindful and I'm not trying to cast judgment on the whole system because it is this beautiful polarity and this dance that when acknowledged and done in awareness is a very beautiful thing.

But. When it's not, you can get lost in being the predator or being the attractive prey and forget, like, this is just a game. We are both equally empowered beings, looking to actually find a union, where there is no predator prey, where it's just two equal spirits and beings that are going to jump in and dance in this beautiful resonance.

PORANGUI: Yes, and I think there's something to be said about the context again, that we're living in, in our society and, and in a quote unquote patriarchal society, there's a really important piece that we have to acknowledge as men that we're in this position of power inherently by the way the system is presently configured, and we're being asked in a very deep way by the feminine, I believe at this time.

To, to look at ourselves and look at this old story. Almost like it, the excuse, almost like the alpha male and the whole thing of like, it's almost been dressed up like a sexy story that's like, this is kind of a nice narrative that we all can buy into. And it's just how nature is. Look at lions, right?

Look at, whereas there's a deeper piece there. I think we have to look at, I find and, and ask the question, how do we step from being a predator to being protector? 

AUBREY: Yeah. 

PORANGUI: What does it look like when we can actually create safety for the feminine and still have our freedom? Which we need as men. Yeah. It's really important.

And what is that sacred relationship with the feminine? And I say feminine because I to say the gender, obviously our biological gender, whatever it is, if we identify as masculine or feminine, we all have both to different degrees. But how we then walk in a beauty way with the feminine in a way that we can create that safety and not just for our beloved, but for all women.

How can, for me, for instance, at a performance, at a show, when we're producing an event or retreat, how do I make it so that all the women there can feel really fucking safe? Yeah, like so safe that they can just unfurl and be themselves, be fully witnessed, unapologetic, and know that they're not gonna be judged.

Know that they're not gonna be taken advantage of, know that they are so safe and held. What I find time and time again, and even in my relationship with Ashley, it's like when I'm able to do that for her in a good way, like what emerges out of that, the real power of the feminine. It's, we haven't even seen yet.

I feel like we haven't even seen the real medicine that women have for us as men on this earth. Like they embody the earth and the intelligence of our earth mother in a way that we can't and, and not 'cause it's bad or it's lacking, but literally because that's not our role. Our sacred role is to create safety, to tend the fire, to make the house the hearth, a safe place for them to then be our guiding staff of wisdom to receive the intelligence through their moon cycle and their sacred union with the earth and with their relationship with their sacred organs.

And when they're in internal order, they're able to help us stay on course of how we're to move all of civilization, all of the world. 

AUBREY: Forward in a good way. And it is a very important point to say that the biological gender, depending on your genitals, it doesn't matter. I've known women who are like the praying mantis.

Like, here I am, I'm this irresistible prey. But as soon as I get you in my grasp, I'm gonna eat your head off. Like you're done and I'm going to chew you up and spit you out. And it's this reversal. And that's again, just taking back like, oh yeah, you think you're the predator.

Come here, predator. Come, come, come to my cave Predator. Watch yourself be devoured, and it comes all back from the same wound, the same 

PORANGUI: original wound. 

AUBREY: Yeah. And so it can be absolutely. Either way. And it's just tapping into those different energies that are all available to all of us.

And also as men, that ability to tap into the feminine and feel the earth. And in some ways we're all the feminine, like we are the mother, but just with genitals, just with a penis and balls. But we're still the mother. It's not like we're still mother earth, we're still the mother.

We're just embodying a masculine energy if we so choose to embody that masculine energy. But it's all, we're all part of this same thing. We're all earth. We can't escape water. Fire, air. 

PORANGUI: That's it. Yeah. Ethos. 

AUBREY: All of the elemental beings, we're all of that. And I think we can also forget that these energies are available to us, but there is something very sacred about when you're really in resonance with the energy that is naturally and innately a part of you which is something that's just kind of your proclivity.

It's your perspective with the proclivity for this certain thing. And when you surrender to that, like what is it that really wants to come through to me? Is it more masculine energy or is it more feminine energy? Or is there some way that this has been warped, some wound that has created this expression that's more feminine, or this expression that's more masculine than what my real blueprint, my real nature as a spirit embodied wants to in that sacred want.

Like what do I really want? Like what it really wants to express. 

We can get out of the way and not judge that. Doesn't matter what genitals we have, but like really just listen. All right, what energy do I want to cultivate and do I wanna cultivate more of this? Or do I wanna cultivate more of this?

Do I wanna express more of this and how can I deepen this level of mastery? 

PORANGUI: One of the things that's been happening during this last year with Covid is, has been this opportunity for me to be off the road and not have to be on the road touring. And in that there's been a lot that's happened around kind of cancel culture and a lot of the Me Too movement that came out.

And there was a lot of artists, other musicians, peers of mine who were actually being called out by women who'd been really gone through horrible experiences with these men. Yeah. Who naturally already were men. Were not only men, but we were men who put on a stage who have a lot of fans, a lot of beings who are looking to us as leaders.

We're leaders, we're, quote unquote, in a way we're more powerful than politicians in some ways 'cause we're able to not be in all that bullshit, but we're still able to influence people and how they feel through music. And so it's a really sacred responsibility. And in that time, one of the prayers that came through for both Ash and I was the importance of being able to take this opportunity of other men, other artists not being on the road and to come together and to start doing men's work.

And so I've actually had this gift this year where I've gotten to get together with other of my peers, touring artists full on, who are not touring during this time. Now things are changing, starting to open up. But back in September we did our first men's retreat where I facilitated with another brother from The Sacred Sons.

And we went through this beautiful container that we created for a group of touring musicians who normally wouldn't be as easy for us to hang out with other, just other men, obviously, because it might be fans, things like that. So being with your peers. And I share this because as we did the work, there was something so powerful that came through in that.

And for me it's been super healing of this getting really in touch with where am I needing to look at my blind spots? Where am I able to really show up in a deeper way for the feminine and do so in a way? And if I'm able to do that, it's like this notion of if I'm able to do that and actually live it on and off stage, in other words, not only singing these songs and bringing this message through my music, but when I'm actually living that, and this was with these other artists as well, which I won't name outta confidentiality, it was so powerful to feel what happens.

It's like our music became more powerful. Like what was coming through us was that much more potent and, and there's something to be said. I feel like at this time on the earth, we're being asked as artists to really step into another level, I believe as human beings, and I say artists, I mean capital A, all of us artists.

To really live in a greater resonance with truth and being our word and not just speaking it. 'cause it sounds nice and it sounds like a good idea and it's been kicking my ass. This has been such a challenging year 'cause I've been home and I've been without any outlets and my partner locked up in a small house.

Having to figure out what to do as an artist and not doing body work, not having any of the outlets of expression that I normally have. And so when you bottle up the creativity that I carry, it can get ugly. Sure. Sure. And I've been humbled by it. Sure. And Sedona like a literally amplifier of everything.

And so I've been super humbled by it and it's also been so freaking healing and that when I show up and I've been blessed to have a partner who's been so patient with me and willing to be there with me. And as I go through my process with this, I just, I'm coming back to re-upping in this relationship and like showing up.

Here we are 10 years in and I'm still in this, and it's like, there's that part of me that wants to leave and like, I've had enough. I want to give up, throw in the towel. I need to change this. And I'm just like, this is my biggest teacher of all my teachers showing up through my fear, through my anger, through the rage, the wounded masculine, and through my father and my grandfather and all those things I've inherited to be able to literally choose differently.

To say, so what? There's that anger again. So what? And immediately be able to, then I get to choose differently. I get to show up and, and choose love. I get to love you through your stubbornness. I get to love you through your anger and your resentment. For me, because I'm not showing up this way, I get to laugh at this and in that laughter and that play, come back to my heart and then show up in just total love, unconditional love.

When that happens each and it's a day by day play. I don't know what's gonna happen today. Sure. We come back late last night from the studio working all night and Ashley's just like, where were you? I made dinner. What the hell? And it's like, I love you. Yeah. I'm choosing love. I can get triggered, but I'm choosing love right now and sometimes I can't, I gotta go crash out.

I cannot deal. But having the discernment to be like, babe, I don't, I don't have the resources right now. Let me, let me just, I need to take some time. I promise I'll be back in this amount of time. Yeah. And just having that responsibility versus the old me that might be like, well, what the fuck? I've been working my ass off all day.

Like and might go another way. Sure. It's like there's just this level that this year in this men's work and this invitation, coming back to this question of how can we show up as better men right now? How do we show up as better men in society? How do we show up as better men? But it's doing that inner work in ourselves.

I believe right now we're being asked to do in such a deep way. 'cause by doing so in these little ways, like we were saying earlier, it makes such an impact on our families, on our communities, on the whole planet. In service to the mother. 

AUBREY: Yeah. This is the time and it feels like collectively, as things continue to spiral in interesting and challenging ways, this is the time.

And I don't discount the synchronicity of this kind of deep process and the challenge that I've felt as well individually, how it's been showing up at this time. The world as well. It's kind of like, alright, now the stakes are growing and the things are going now how can you laugh through this too?

Can you love through this too? Can you choose this different way through this too? And it's a beautiful, it's a beautiful opportunity that we have. It's a blessing to be here at this time when we can really make a significant impact. And the stakes are high.

That's the classic, like what brings the best out of any, surfer or any athlete. One of the flow state triggers is there has to be stakes. Like a great surfer who surfs a little baby wave. Yeah. He might be having fun, but it's not gonna bring out his best ride.

But when it's. A big wave where the stakes are high and he could crash, or it's a big competition, that's why people like the playoffs in sports. 'cause the stakes are high. It matters more. It's an agreed upon thing that matters more. But now it feels like the whole world is like, okay, it matters more now.

It matters more now than it ever has. And so it's the opportunity to bring more. And it's also, can go the other way. It can cause people to be like, this is too much. And they'll have to hit bottom and bounce off before they have the energy to accept this kind of mantle. And I've certainly done a little bit of both, a little bit of crashing and a little bit of showing up.

But when you just reframe it as like, okay, now, now here's another even greater opportunity. And a greater invitation. To be better, and not that better may be the wrong word, but to be, be the fullest expression of what I'm capable of. 

PORANGUI: And 

AUBREY: really set my priorities right And become even more aware of my hidden subconscious patterns and just say, nah, this is me and this is what I stand for.

And that's the beauty of the time we're in right now. And I think we all chose it. We're like, all right, we're coming here for this. We're here for this shit. 

PORANGUI: It's here, 

AUBREY: we're here for this. 

PORANGUI: Yeah. And so it's, like the thinking of the hunter again. It's like we're being asked to really be hunters.

In this way of, we have to really be on our game, tracking the parts of us, the shadow part of us that is really wanting to kind of go with the comfort, go with the default, kind of back to normal life as it was before Covid for instance. It's like we're being asked, I think right now to really track like, where can we live more in integrity and impeccability and sobriety?

And I don't mean sobriety, just like not drinking alchemy. Like what is sobriety when we're not just feeding ourselves, drunk on our own delusion. Yeah. And the motion and whatever that trigger that we go back to those patterns, catastrophizing or the, 

AUBREY: Drunk on our Instagram following, drunk on our likes, drunk on our metrics. Yes. Drunk on what other people think about us. Drunk on the drama of the world. 

PORANGUI: Yeah. 

AUBREY: And then you can sober up for a minute and say like, oh wow. 

PORANGUI: One of our teachers calls this the inner chief, that we all have an inner chief.

And so it's like really calling on our inner chief, that ability to choose. The chief chooses What are you choosing right now? You get to choose, you want to feel it. Take back your power. In that moment when you could easily just go to that default behavior, that default reaction and choose.

I'm choosing right now to show up differently. I'm choosing to let that go. Yeah. I'm choosing to laugh at this 'cause this is ridiculous. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm choosing to say so fucking what? Yeah. And I'm gonna show up and I'm gonna play and I'm gonna meet you with total love and total presence. Yeah. And that's, I feel, is like the big piece that is being invited right now.

And, and it's not that it's gonna be perfect every day. It's like each time you fall off the horse, dust it off, love yourself, get back up on the horse. And so each day, like in the men's work, and I think you've been doing some of this yourself, no doubt. It's so helpful because to have a council, whether it's men or women, having your group of peers that can be there and really hear you when you share, like I fell off and help you get cleaned up.

Literally like the first thing we do on our calls with the other men is we do an honor roll we call it, where we check in and like, where have we been out of integrity? Where have I not been my word. The brothers are able to then hold that and then give me suggestions to help me clean it up. How can I get back in integrity?

Because it's not like about beating myself up and now I'm just gonna, because that just leads to the same, just gonna keep going back and doing the same behavior versus like, I'm committing to this. You all witness me and hold me, and maybe I need to do 20 pushups. Maybe I need to go do some specific task, 

to honor what I went out of integrity around 

AUBREY: symbol, 

PORANGUI: as a symbol. It's symbolic. 

AUBREY: the, without the shame and the thing. But like, all right. Yeah. I, it's so liberating. Yeah. I think that's beautiful. Let's talk about this album. Yo, let's talk about this album.

Yeah. So the idea as this birth was, through fit for service and through many of the different practices, we've, I've really understood the deep, deep value of certain practices. Mm. Setting a, a beautiful intention, offering a prayer breath work, like really going deep into the body and, and with your breath and pran and the, whether it's Wim h or whether it's shaman angelic, which is Anhata who first taught this to me, or whether it's your own yogic practice, breath of fire or Kundalini or whatever it is.

But breath, work, practice, so valuable, ecstatic dance. Something else we talked about these, these technologies that can really liberate. Meditation, going deep into the stillness, finding the source. And then the integration, and then the, the desire to be of service and to bring these gifts back out to the world.

Yeah. And so we identified these five kind of core things for a human being, from intention setting, breath work, dance, meditation, and integration. And we're like, all right, how do we bring this into, into music, into a musical journey? Gathering as many of the maestros of these different arts as we could, and end up with myself and you and Eric Zang as incredibly talented musician.

Amani amazing. Who's an amazing friend, amazing musician. And Vylana has an amazing divine voice. And so it's the five of us. Creating this hour long journey of music, and I'm offering my spoken word and my poetry through this and weaving this all together for an experience like experiential music.

And it's been an amazing process to dive in and watch this all unfold. 

PORANGUI: Your first album, huh? First album, man. It's been incredible. How do you feel right now? For those, I don't know when everyone's gonna be listening, but we literally, last night we just finished your final takes and kind of just listening through the last pieces.

So we've been in such a deep birthing process here. 

AUBREY: It's been interesting, I mean, it's first there's I had this kind of vision for this, and that's a role that I'm always been good at seeing things and like seeing like this is something that's important.

And that was my initial contribution is the vision in some of the organization. And then I knew that the words, was also what I would contribute. But also being around such masters with such superpowers, all of you, and just watching guys like, holy shit, you can do that with a drum, with a vase, with a table, and you can just sing like this and you can do all, and you can make music from a computer like this.

And so there was some of that and there was a moment of like, wow, this is a lot. And then I knew that I had to really bring the very best that I could, and I started with some words, and the words were just, they weren't quite there. And then just trying to get deeper and deeper and doing my own work these past weeks, our session and my own work.

PORANGUI: I 

AUBREY: gotta say 

PORANGUI: ab, like can freaking get some words down awfully fast. I'm quite envious. I'm like, that's definitely a superpower. Yeah. 

AUBREY: I mean the words, but to get them really right. The refinement to get them really right, where they're really coming from the heart.

And these symbols are meaning and placed in the place that I want them to be placed. It's been a really amazing process and it's been an immense amount of work though, I mean, this is long, long days in the studio and it's, people don't realize how much goes in. No, not all, to every minute of 

PORANGUI: sound and like, 

AUBREY: yeah.

Every five seconds of sound. Every measure. Each bar yeah. 

PORANGUI: It's so much thought and presence. And presence. It's like the long form. Right. It's like, 'cause you have to really, as you construct, we're architecting, creating the bed and creating the forms above that and the other forms above that.

And then it's like going back, oh, that bed doesn't work anymore. So you're this, this whole dialogue on all these levels and then that level is expanded across time. Yeah. And all the emotions, right. There's different emotions that are unfolding and how we want the emotions to land and the cadence.

Really feeling, right. How we want each to progress into the next 'cause. This isn't just like we're riding a five minute like hit song, pop song. Yeah, totally. It's like each piece is like 15 minutes and it's a journey and they weave into the next. And they need to each have their sequence in a way that someone could listen to an hour without wanting to like hit next.

AUBREY: Yeah. Exactly. A place that their mind isn't wandering off, that they can really be present with this. This wasn't designed as background music. For you to be doing something else and just listen to, there's a lot of beautiful music that does that, that can be like this kind of background soundtrack to your own life.

But this is a journey. And I think that was what was exciting. It was the uniqueness of what this offering really was, there's lots of music that you can dance to, and there's music that you can do breath work to, and I've done that. Music you can meditate to, but the intention from every little craft was for specifically this purpose.

It wasn't just like, it can be used for this, but the intentionality of everything is I think what the unique offering of this is. And the title of the album is Remembrance. It's to remember these essential practices the essential nature of who we are. The one who can set a prayer and an intention, the one who breathes with consciousness, the one who dances completely free of self-judgment.

And that watching eye that's saying, am I doing it right? And the one that can let everything go and just go deep, deep into the stillness, and then the one that can come back and serve. That's all of us. That's everybody. 

PORANGUI: When we do that sequence, the sequence is so key because it literally takes you in just the right way so that it leaves you in this place of more wholeness and in inability to then show up in greater service.

Yeah. And that's really what we said. So the name of the band, yeah. I don't know if you wanna reveal it. Yeah, 

AUBREY: for sure. 

PORANGUI: Good 

AUBREY: For the good of all. And that was that thing of like, if we're all worried about, all right, what are there gonna be the Spotify numbers and what are gonna be this and what are gonna be that we're missing the point of our whole band.

That's not the point. Exactly. It's like, this is a, this is a act of service. We all have our own beautiful things that are going on, and of course our ego gets woven in and it's, it's a natural part and has to be accepted. But really the prayer is that this is just.

Something that's going to be of service, maybe to a few, maybe to many. But it's our damn best effort. And that's beautiful. All we can ever be responsible for, just, that's it. We gave it everything and we're still, and I know it's not done, and if you don't like it, so what, so what, so 

PORANGUI: what, when do you think it'll be ready?

That's a good question. I don't know when this podcast is gonna drop, but we'll probably try to time it somewhat close, so. Okay. Yeah. So prob I mean, we still got mixing stage, which that one can be anywhere from a couple weeks to a month. I'm guessing, so I'm thinking probably in July sometime.

Alright. Yeah. Maybe beginning of August. Yeah. In that window frame. Yeah. So we'll see when this releases for mastering. Depending on mastering, we still have to do too. So 

AUBREY: maybe this will be like a early preview to get y'all stoked or maybe this will be coming right out or about at the time of release.

We'll see when this launches, but it's been just such a pleasure to. Man, just be in this life with you, brother. Yeah. I love you so much, man. And I've gotten so many, so many gifts from you. Thank you. Likewise. 

PORANGUI: Yeah. So grateful for all the ways that we've gotten to support each other on this journey, and no doubt it's just beautiful to think back to that first session when we met.

Right? I know. And at Grace Grove. Yeah. On the table and, yeah, 

AUBREY: just, I was just another massage therapist. Okay. Now it's time for your body work. All right, great. This sounds relaxing. 

PORANGUI: He's like, was that a flipper? I think it was a, 

AUBREY: that, and that was also my first breath work too. 

PORANGUI: It was also the first breath work, right?

AUBREY: That was a huge, huge moment where these new things started to really unfurl and things that Now I think most people kind of have an idea. Like they're starting to, and we need all of them. We need 'em all. This is the time where we need all of the technologies from our plant teachers, from our spirit teachers, from our human teachers, from every, every different technology and medicine.

It's time, it's time. Mama needs us. More than ever. That's it. Yeah. Okay. Let's go. Yeah, let's go. You wanna bring us home with a little music brother? 

PORANGUI: Where you coming from?

AUBREY: Where you going?

Thank you, brother. Thank you one, love you. I love you too. And thank you for everybody being on this journey here, on this podcast as appropriate. This was a medicine journey for me. Every time we get together is, where's some, what's some things you can share with some people? Things that you're working on, things that you got going on, brother.

PORANGUI: Yeah, so pretty big things coming down the pipeline. We've got several. Bodies of work, of music. This project that we're doing, there's two albums of music that I have to sit on for a little bit. For a very special project for this new clinic that's coming out it's amazing place that our dear brother, Dr.

Dan and brother Gunter been working on, it's called Kuya. So we're really excited for that. It's gonna be an incredible prayer and offering to the world. And so I've been making music for them for the clinical setting and I can only say that for now. So stay tuned, but two amazing albums.

And two more to come. Soll be four hours of music for therapy coming hopefully starting to release beginning in the fall. And this summer after we finish this project and the mixings all done, I'm going into a two month period of total inner work where I'm gonna be birthing my next solo album, which has been long time coming.

And I'm just really, really gonna be thinking of all of you. And thank you all for just holding me in your thoughts and prayers as these new songs come through. This song that I just sang for you is one of them. And so it's a little preview of what's to come my way home. And this by the way, is the, we were talking about hunters multiple moments in this.

And I just wanna say this is the hunter's harp from Burkina Faso, west Africa. This is the hunters would carry this instrument and they would play the songs of the hunt and tell the stories that way. So felt apropos to have it here with us. 10 strings on this one. Sometimes they vary from eight to 12 to 15 strings.

And I love the 10 'cause it's like the 10 fingers. Invite us, what are we doing with these hands? What are we creating? We're pulling the trigger. Are we igniting each other's hearts on fire? So with that there will be also a retreat. Anybody out there who would like to come and experience the music?

I've mentioned the music as Medicine Retreats. This will be the fifth one. We're doing it this fall. The dates are coming up, it's beginning of November right after Fit for Service. So really excited to share that. That's gonna be here in Sedona, Arizona. And yeah. And then beyond that, we just started an A platform with C-O-V-I-D-A new network.

Music is Medicine is the platform, and it's under my website, ang.com to go to members and you guys can join that. And that's a way that I'm getting to create an amazing community off the socials and the algorithms controlling things. And as you guys started one for fit for service. I know it's amazing as well.

So it's so incredible to be able to have a direct channel where we can share our hearts and really be vulnerable and share some of the skills I've been teaching on there. There's some different groups that are formed there including offering all the replays of the medicine streams that I did.

So anyone who doesn't know. During covid with no touring, I started as an offering doing these, what we call the medicine streams, which were live streams of basically performances prayers with Ashley and I in the studio here at AT at our house and making these offerings. We started every Sunday. We did it in the beginning of Covid.

Every Sunday is just like church, where we're just gonna get down and just bring through the prayers sonically, and it was so good. It was just felt so necessary with all the things happening. Sure. Those all stayed is the full replays. There's snippets that stayed online that anyone can check out, but the full replays, the two hour sets are all there through our network.

So feel free to check those out. There's a lot of beautiful music there, all original stuff, so tons of good music. So I'm, part of that is I'm going back to those recordings to pick like, okay, what were the jewels that want go into this album? Yeah. And then just like flesh them out even more. And super stoked to share that.

So if anyone would like to check me out. And then I've also been teaching there and there's replays for all my classes, but this summer I'm not gonna be doing any new content 'cause of the albums. And then in the fall I'll pick back up probably with some medicine streams. And I think as we start to tour again, we'll probably be streaming some of our shows as part of that, like those who can't make it to one of our live shows.

But. Come to the live show 

AUBREY: and trimester three in fit for service. Wow. That's right. We're throwing down. You'll gonna be doing a live ecstatic dance here in Sedona. Unbelievable. So obviously anybody who's drawn to the Fit for Service Fellowship check that out 'cause you'll be able to get a.

Front row experience of p and Ashley in their medicine. So, 

PORANGUI: and last but not least Ashley, my beloved Ashley Klein, who you guys I think have, referred to her a lot. She's an incredible mover dancer. That's definitely her medicine. She's gonna be teaching her first embodiment retreat that she's doing with another sister Odessa amazing dancer, masters, somatic, masters of the Body.

And they're doing their first one in October here in Sedona, which we're super stoked about. Yeah, she's been there supporting me through all my work in the world and a massive piece of that. And this is, I'm finally like, okay, enough. You can, you gotta get out there girl.

And so this retreat's gonna Beautiful. Yeah. Beautiful inauguration of that. And I'm excited to share that medicine with the world. Thank you, brother. Thank you. We love you guys. Thank 

AUBREY: you. Thanks for tuning into this video. Make sure you hit subscribe. Follow me at Aubrey Marcus. Check out the Aubrey Marcus podcast available everywhere, and leave a comment.

Let me know if this video resonated or what else you would like to hear from me in the future. Thank you so much.